dragos

Credeam ca vrei s-o inviti la o cafea

daca o sa deveniti "addicted" http://www.engineering.com/GamesPuzzles/Civiballs2.aspx

_SXNAtwYMBw

Buni pui!

Imi pare rau, habar n-am ruseste. Altfel as fi pus si frun banc rusesc. Cred 8-)

Otilia Cazimir - Ninge! Ssst!… Maicuta gerului, Cu manuta inghetata, Bate-n poarta cerului Si intreaba suparata: - Unde-s stelele de sus? - Ica, nu-s! Vantul rau le-a scuturat Si le-mprastie prin sat. Uite una: s-a desprins Dintr-o margine de nor Si coboara-ncetisor… - Oare-a nins? E un fulg si-i cel dintai Si aduce-n vant ninsoare, Drumuri albe peste vai, Ras curat in ochii tai, Sanioare, Zurgalai…

Desfrunzit şi prea bătrân, Tremură de frig gorunul. Au căzut şi-ntâii fulgi Şi l-am prins din zbor pe unul. Migălos lucrată-n fir, Floarea mică şi rotundă S-a topit şi a murit – O minune de-o secundă. M-am întors înduioşat Să scriu trista ei poveste; Despre-un fulg care-a venit Timpuriu şi nu mai este. -“Pentru ce n-ai mai rămas În înaltul bolţii tale, De-ai venit atât de pur Spre noroaiele din vale? Care vânt neliniştit, Răsucindu-te cu ură, Ţi-a mânat către pământ Prea gingaşa ta făptură? Şi de vreme ce sosişi, Pentru ce-ai dat morţii vamă? Nu puteai să fii de-argint, Ori de sticlă, ori de scamă?” Dar în vreme ce scriam Întrebarea mea nebună, N-am văzut cum lângă geam Ninge-ntruna şi întruna. Iar când ochii mi-am-nălţat, Am văzut cum prin ninsoare Valea-ntreagă lumina Minunat scăpărătoare. (Nicolae Labis) Primele poze din lume facute, incepand cu 1885, fulgilor de nea: http://nethervoice.com/nethervoice/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/Wilson-Bentley.jpg http://cmp.roularta.be/cmdata/Images/site72/nieuws/wetenschap/wetenschap21/sneeuwvlokje300.jpg http://expertvoices.nsdl.org/polar/files/2009/02/snowflake.jpg http://people.cis.ksu.edu/~dkm/ilike/snowf-12m.jpg http://drawnassociation.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/SnowflakesWilsonBentley.jpg http://glenwoodfree.net/People/NQR/Archives/V1.1/snowflake.jpg http://z.about.com/d/weather/1/0/b/0/-/-/wea02091.jpg Nu vi le pun pe toate ca sunt vreo 5000

ddhVSQlExYE

http://www.nieuwsblad.be/Assets/Images_Upload/2010/01/23/dikdik2.jpg.h380.jpg.568.jpg

Poti sa pui, bineinteles. Dar sa fie umor englezesc

http://c0378172.cdn.cloudfiles.rackspacecloud.com/treehouseoshatzwilkinson.jpg http://www.gizmag.com/treehouse-oshatz-wilkinson/13935/ http://c0388982.cdn.cloudfiles.rackspacecloud.com/5627_130506110140.jpg http://www.gizmag.com/go/5627/ http://c0388982.cdn.cloudfiles.rackspacecloud.com/3704_13050614027.jpg http://www.gizmag.com/go/3704/ http://c0378172.cdn.cloudfiles.rackspacecloud.com/10409_21110832944.jpg http://www.gizmag.com/tree-house-living-baumraum/10409/ http://c0378172.cdn.cloudfiles.rackspacecloud.com/solarpoweredtreehouseonstilts.jpg http://www.gizmag.com/solar-powered-sch ... use/13384/

iU9PWCqEdPE zhMRJMEJW2k BA551Jy8WUg

I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any. Last night I dreamed I ate a ten-pound marshmallow, and when I woke up the pillow was gone. Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off. A woman told her doctor, 'I've got a bad back. 'The doctor said, 'It's old age.' The woman said, 'I want a second opinion. 'The doctor says, 'OK. you're ugly as well.' A man walked into the doctor's, he said 'I've hurt my arm in several places'. The doctor said 'well don't go there any more'. I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'have you got anything for wind?' So he gave me a kite. I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for 'flu. So I went, and I got it.' I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day. Now I can’t get the cobwebs out of her hair. I became a member of The Secret Seven. It's so secret, I don't even know who the other six are... A guy walks into a pub with a lump of asphalt on His shoulder, He says to the bar man give us a pint and one for the road. A man goes into the doctors. The doctor says, 'Go over to the window and stick your tongue out.' Man says, Why? The doctor says, 'I don't like my neighbours' 'Doc, I can't stop singing the green green grass of home. 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?' 'It's not unusual.' 'I was standing at a party the other night and across the room was an attractive woman. I looked at her and cocked my eye. She looked at me and cocked her eye back. And there we stood, cock-eyed. I went into a butchers and I said, 'I'll have a pound of sausages. 'He said, 'I'm very sorry, sir, we only serve kilos in here. 'I said, 'Okay then I'll have a pound of kilos.' So I said to the doctor. 'People keep taking the Mickey out of me because I keep thinking I'm a cricket ball. 'The doctor said 'Howzat?' I said, 'don't you start'. So I knocked on the door at this bed & Breakfast and a lady stuck her head out of the window and said: 'What do you want', I said, 'I want to stay here'. She said, 'Well stay there' and shut the window. 'I got up just like that, well it could of been like that, but, no it was like that.... anyway I leapt up, and I opened the door in my pyjamas, It's a funny place to have a door I know'. Man went into a bar. He went 'Ouch'. It was an iron bar. Man went into a bar, he only had one arm. Guy sitting next to him said 'Hey, you've got your sleeve in my drink', man replied, 'There's no (h)arm in it' ----------------- 'I had a meal last night. I ordered everything in French, surprised everybody. It was a Chinese restaurant. I said to this Chinese waiter, 'Look, this chicken I got here is cold. 'He said, 'It should be, it's been dead two weeks.' I said, 'Not only that. 'I said, I said... I said it twice, I said, 'He's got one leg shorter than the other. 'He said, 'What do you wanna do with it, eat it or dance with it?' I said, 'Forget the chicken, give me a lobster, and he brought me this lobster. I said just a minute, he's only got one claw. 'He said 'Well he's been in a fight. 'I said, 'Well give me the winner.' ----------------- A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. 'My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him? 'Well, 'says the vet, 'let's have a look at him' so he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says ' I'm going to have to put him down. 'What? Because he's cross-eyed?' No, because he's really heavy' A man goes to the Psychiatrists and the Psychiatrist says: 'What's the problem' The man says, 'I think I'm becoming a kleptomaniac. 'The Psychiatrist says, 'Here take these tablets and if you're no better in a week' ..... 'Bring me a colour TV'. I backed horse last week at ten to one. It came in at quarter past four. I went to see my neighbour and knocked on their door. The lady of the house answered, I thought she looked a bit odd. I asked her if her husband was in. 'Johnny passed away this morning I'm afraid' she said. 'Oh dear, that's awful' I said 'What on earth happened?' 'Well he just told me that he felt a little poorly and took to his bed and that was it' I didn't know what to say. I asked if she was with him at the end. 'Yes. I was' she sobbed. I enquired if he managed any last words. 'Well, yes a few' she said. So I asked her, 'He didn't say anything about a tin of red paint did he? -------------------------- Each year it was the custom for the very best performers to appear at the Royal Command Performance. At the end of the show the very best of the best were introduced to the Queen. 'Did you think I was funny?', Tommy Cooper asked the Queen. 'Yes, very funny Tommy', replied the Queen. 'Did your Mother think I was funny?', Tommy asked. 'Yes, she laughed non-stop', said the Queen 'Would you mind if I ask a personal question?', Tommy asked. 'No, you can ask, but I am not be able to answer', the Queen Replied 'Who are you supporting in the Cup Final?', asked Tommy. 'Neither, I am impartial' , said the Queen. ' 'In that case, ... ' said Tommy, '....do you mind if I have your Cup Final Tickets?' ---------------------------------

http://www.guy-sports.com/fun_pictures/TommyCooper2.jpg http://www.guy-sports.com/fun_pictures/TommyCooperFingers.jpg Two cannibals eating a clown. One says to the other, "Does this taste funny to you?" **************** An 83-year old woman decided that she'd seen and done everything, and the time had come to depart from this world. After considering various methods of doing away with herself she came to a conclusion. The quickest and surest way would be to shoot herself through the heart. The trouble was, she wasn't certain about exactly where her heart was, so she phoned her doctor and asked him. He told her that her heart was located two inches below her left nipple. She shot herself in the left kneecap. ********************* A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.' ************************** Patient : Doctor, you've got to help me. Every night I get the urge to go downstairs and stick my dick into the biscuit tin. Do you know what's wrong with me? Doctor : Yes ... 'You're fucking crackers.' ********************* "Cos it's strange, isn't it. You stand in the middle of a library and go 'Aaaaaaagghhhh' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in. ********************** "So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'" ************************* "You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' " ************************* "So I went down my local ice-cream shop, and said I want to buy an ice-cream'. He said 'Hundreds & thousands?' I said 'We'll start with one.' He said 'Knickerbocker glory?' I said 'I do get a certain amount of freedom in these trousers, yes.' ************************************ So I went to the dentist. He said "Say Aaah." I said, "Why?" He said , "My dog's died.'" *************** "Now, most dentist's chairs go up and down, don't they? The one I was in went back and forwards. I thought 'This is unusual'. And the dentist said to me 'Mr Cooper, get out of the filing cabinet.'" ****************************** "So I got home, and the phone was ringing. I picked it up, and said, 'Who's speaking please?' And a voice said, 'You are.'" ***************************** "So I rang up my local swimming baths. I said, 'Is that the local swimming baths?' He said 'It depends where you're calling from.'" ******************************** "So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said, 'I'm not stopping you.' *********************************** "Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu... But I think it's Colin." ************************************** "So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he said 'You've been promoted.' And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said "You've been promoted again.' And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said 'You're managing director.' And I went into a tree. A policeman came up and said 'What happened to you?' And I said 'I careered off the road.'

A man walks into a doctor's office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear. "What's the matter with me?" he asks the doctor. The doctor replies, "You're not eating properly." --------------- The woman was in bed with her lover and had just told him how stupid her Irish husband was when the door was thrown open and there stood her husband. He glared at her lover and bellowed, "What are you doing?" "There," said the wife, "didn't I tell you he was stupid?" --------------- Mark called in to see his friend Angus (a Scotman) to find he was stripping the wallpaper from the walls. Rather obviously, he remarked "You're decorating, I see." to which Angus replied "No. I'm moving house." ---------------- One day an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walked into a pub together. They each bought a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage, three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the thick head. The Englishman pushed his beer away in disgust. The Scotsman fished the fly out of his beer, and continued drinking it, as if nothing had happened. The Irishman, too, picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer, and started yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT YOU BASTARD!!!!" ------------------------- 1st Eskimo: Where did your mother come from? 2nd Eskimo: Alaska 1st Eskimo: Don't bother, I'll ask her myself! ------------------------------ An English man and an Irish man are driving head on , at night, on a twisty, dark road. Both are driving too fast for the conditions and collide on a sharp bend in the road. To the amazement of both, they are unscathed, though their cars are both destroyed. In celebration of their luck, both agree to put aside their dislike for the other from that moment on. At this point, the Englishman goes to the boot and fetches a 12 year old bottle of whisky. He hands the bottle to the Irish man, whom exclaims,'' may the Irish and the English live together forever, in peace, and harmony.'' The Irish man then tips the bottle and gulps half of the bottle down. Still flabbergasted over the whole thing, he goes to hand the bottle to the Englishman, whom replies: '' no thanks, I'll just wait till the Police get here!'' ------------------------- There was an Scotsman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer sitting together in a carriage in a train going through Wales. Suddenly the train went through a tunnel and as it was an old style train,there were no lights in the carriages and it went completely dark. Then there was this kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer and the Scotsman were sitting as if nothing had happened and the Englishman had his hand against his face as he had been slapped. The Englishman was thinking: 'The Scottish fella must have kissed Claudia Schiffer and she missed him and slapped me instead.' Claudia Schiffer was thinking: 'The English fella must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Scotsman and got slapped for it.' And the Scotsman was thinking: 'This is great. The next time the train goes through a tunnel I'll make that kissing noise and slap that English bastard again . --------------------------- What kind of ears does an engine have? Engineers ----------------------------- A Scots boy came home from school and told his mother he had been given a part in the school play. "Wonderful," says the mother, "What part is it?" The boy says "I play the part of the Scottish husband!" The mother scowls and says: "Go back and tell your teacher you want a speaking part." -------------------------------- An Irishman had no idea his wife was having an affair, so he was mad with grief when coming home early one day he surprised her and her lover in the act. He grabbed a pistol and pointed it at his head, which made his wife burst out laughing. "What do you think you're laughing at," he cried, "you're next." --------------------------- An Englishman, roused by a Scot's scorn of his race, protested that he was born an Englishman and hoped to die an Englishman. "Man," scoffed the Scot, "hiv ye nae ambeetion (Have you no ambition)?" -------------------------- Mike and his pregnant wife live on a farm in a rural area in the west of England. No running water, no electricity, etc. One night, Mikes' wife is begins to deliver the baby. The local doctor is there in attendance. "What d'ya want me to do, Doctor?" "Hold the lantern, Mike. Here it comes!" the doctor delivers the child and holds it up for the proud father to see. "Mike, you're the proud father of a fine strapping boy." "Saints be praised, I..." Before Mike can finish the Doctor interrupts, "Wait a minute. Hold the lantern, Mike." Soon the doctor delivers the next child. "You've a full set now, Mike. A beautiful baby daughter." "Thanks be to..." Again the Doctor cuts in, "Hold the lantern, Mike, Hold the lantern!" Soon the Doctor delivers a third child. The doctor holds up the baby for Mike's inspection. "Doctor," asks Mike, "Do you think it's the light that's attracting them?" ------------------------ At an auction in Manchester a wealthy American announced that he had lost his wallet containing £10,000 and would give a reward of £100 to the person who found it. From the back of the hall a Scottish voice shouted, "I'll give £150!" ------------------------- Two Americans are talking. One asks: "What's the difference between capitalism and communism?" "That's easy" says the other one. "In capitalism man exploits man! In communism it is the other way around!" ------------------- An English man, Irishman and a Scottishman are sitting in a pub full of people. The Englishman says, "The pubs in England are the best. You can buy one drink and get a second one free". Everyone in the pub agreed and gave a big cheer. The Scottishman says,"..yeah. That's quite good but in Scotland you can buy one drink and get another 2 for free." Again, the crowd in the pub gave a big cheer. The Irish man says "Your two pubs are good, but they are not as good as the ones in Ireland. In Ireland you can buy one pint, get another 3 for free and then get taken into the backroom for a shag" The English says "WOW! Did that happen to you?" and the Irishman replies "No, but it happened to my sister."

Deja ajunse clasice, pe mine m-au dat pe spate... Enjoy! One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift. The next year, I didn't buy her a gift. She asked me: "Why didn't you buy me any gift this year?" I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" And that's how the fight started..... My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked "What’s on the tv?" I replied "Dust". And that's how the fight started..... My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.' I said, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.' And that's how the fight started..... My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 seconds. I bought her a scale. And that's how the fight started..... I asked my wife, 'Where do you want to go for our anniversary?' It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation. 'Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!' she said. So I suggested, 'How about the kitchen?' And that's when the fight started.... My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have sex?' 'No,' she answered. I then said, 'Is that your final answer?' She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying 'Yes.' So I said, 'Then I'd like to phone a friend.' And that's when the fight started.... I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95. Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream. And that's when the fight started..... I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first. 'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.' He said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?' 'Nah, she can order for herself.' And that's when the fight started..... When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive. So I took her to a gas station. And that's when the fight started.... Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, had some breakfast, and slipped quietly into the garage. With intentions of starting it in the street, I clicked the Harley into neutral, punched the garage door remote, and proceeded out into a torrential downpour. It was raining sideways since the wind was blowing 50 mph, so I backed her into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife’s back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, “The weather out there is terrible.” My loving wife replied, “Can you believe my stupid husband is out riding in that?” And that is when the fight started..... A man and a woman were asleep at 3:00 am like two innocent babies. Suddenly, a loud noise came from outside. The woman, bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man, “That must be my husband!” So the man jumped out of the bed scared and jumped naked out the window. He landed in a thorn bush, and then ran to his car as fast as he could go. A few minutes later he returned and went up to the bedroom and screamed at the woman, “I AM your husband!” The woman yelled back, ‘Yeah, then why were you running?’ And that’s when the fight started.....

Mersi mersi Cat despre dat pe spate, mai sunt feluri de facut midiile, feluri care mie nu-mi plac. D-aia nu le-am pomenit. Dar si mulele facute-n vin sunt foarte bune, asa ca nu te contrazic.

Intai il prindeti http://cancan.ro/usr/imagini/2010/01/20/245362-x_somn_mare_-jpg.jpg

:roll:

Propun sa ne aratam toti cururile ca sa scapam odata de discutiile anapoda despre cururi. Promit sa admir fiecare cur expus si sa fac comentarii apreciative si mistocaresti la adresa fiecarui cur. Long live the cur! Cururi din toate tarile, uniti-va! Hai la forul culinar, cur cu cur sa ne unim... arta sa infaptuim

Lol...si masaj nu face tanti vanzatoare? Da, Bimby al tau ramane pentru mine o dorinta pentru viitorul foarte-foarte indepartat...asta daca nu castig la loto intre timp (yeh, right!) Ar trebui sa fiu nebun sa dau atatia bani pe asa ceva. Mai bine invat sa tai ceapa ca Jamie

http://www.romanians.nl/modules/coppermine/albums/userpics/16223/normal_triste1.jpg

Asa se pare

Cosul ala la care ati racordat hota, e cu ventilatie mecanica? Ce-ai mai putea face este s-o rogi pe vecina cu pricina sa te lase sa vii sa vezi unde si cum are ea racordat burlanul de la hota.

Scoate burlanu'!